I am growing in my faith in myself and believing that today is going to be a better day than was yesterday. That’s a promise!
“Remember that an oak tree once was an acorn, recovery begins by taking one step at a time and accepting responsibility for moving from depression into peace and serenity.”
How often must I learn not to get caught up in the mania of racing thoughts and flights of grandiosity as I flee from the depths of my sadness. I will not run from my sadness but, instead, will focus on the fact that that I have to stake my claim and say, this is it. I am going to get well, starting right now. When I was manic I feel panicky and very jittery, but when I am depressed or feel myself slipping down into the abyss of darkness. I run as fast as I can until I no longer can stop my racing thoughts nor find an end to the obsession of wanting complete perfection in everything that I do.
What this means is that I am going to believe that I am about to be released from a terminal illness. My sadness has dogged me throughout my life. I no longer am willing to give in to this Black Dog of sadness often labeled as “melancholia”. I have tried all the pills to rid myself from the anxiety of my soul until there were no more pills, no more solutions and no more avenues of escape. I could escape the pain from time to time, but not a lifetime of hurtful human experience. I am taking one step at a time — recovery is what my day is about today! The steps are my solution.
God, you call each of us by name. Give us the power to name anything that is blocking us from growing in the wisdom of your will for us today. Lead us in your peace, today.
SOURCE: Higher Thoughts for Down Days:365 Daily Thoughts and Meditations for Members of 12 step Fellowship Groups. Depressed Anonymous Groups. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Pgs. 230-231.