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“I am like a bird singing in the thicket of thorns.”

In my own recovery program I too see myself as a bird singing in the  thicket of thorns. I have spent nearly 30 years practicing these principles (12 steps) in all areas of my life. First, I had to admit that my problem could not be stopped just by my willing it.  I had to do something about it. My will power was powerless when it came to removing the thorns.

For those in recovery and applying the Steps to their own lives, they know about the thicket of thorns in their lives. They know NOW that they can identify with the bird singing in the thorns and appreciate  the fact that life has changed. Now life has become a hopeful place to live, despite difficulties and problems that at one time used to baffle and destroy our hope and serenity. Most of us felt the sting of thorns  (our addictions) that put us at the end of our ropes. Even though I am still plagued with situations not under my control, I can still sing like the bird, which all those enjoying life in recovery   sing.  I  can sing and belt out with melodious tones  those hopeful verses which profess  a Power greater than myself  as it   continues to restore me to sanity.

I am no longer a lonely bird, sitting out there alone and fearful. Now I am part of a fellowship where everyone sings together. They and myself, even though the thorns are still all around us,  celebrate the reality of our own recovery. We all have a song to sing and the thicket of thorns will  never quiet our desire to  share with others our heartfelt joy  over being free. Truly, it is something to sing about. Will you join our chorus, even though  we are ever mindful of the thorns, but always  aware of that Power greater than ourselves who  keeps us singing!!!

Hugh

 

Childhood memories are important.

“Sometimes we become depressed…While the surface causes were a part of the picture, they trigger events that precipitated depression-the underlying causes, I am satisfied, ran much deeper.”

“Intellectually, I could accept my situation. Emotionally I could not.”

“To these problems, there are certainly no pat answers. But, part of the answer surely lies in the constant effort to practice all of the Twelve Steps.” Twelve and Twelve.

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

I understand that my memory is filled with certain concrete scenarios, assuming intellectual, graphic and emotional content. They continue to be stimulated by events in our adult life. Because of my childhood rehearsal of those feelings of being  abandoned,   I  seem to feel them  even more  strongly  now. These  childhood occasions are presently triggered by my present, stressful situations.

I have practiced sadding  myself most of my life. My long term memory bank is filled with stories and graphic pictures of those shameful; situations, as perceived at least by myself and in which I continually rehearse how bad, evil and unacceptable I am to myself and to others.

MEDITATION

God, our hope is in you as we go about our work, our life today. We trust that even though we may have a hard time trusting you to be our friend, we do trust that you will instruct us on how to gradually take mastery over our life and get involved in  our life. (See Step # 3).

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RESOURCE: COPYRIGHT (C) HIGHER THOUGHTS FOR DOWN DAYS: 365 DAILY THOUGHTS AND MEDITATIONS FOR MEMBERS OF 12 STEP FELLOWSHIP GROUPS. Depressed Anonymous Publications.Louisville.

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For those who never experienced love growing up

“Depressed Anonymous provides a secure base (love and acceptance) for those who never experienced love or support while growing up.”

After ten years of repeated meetings with the depressed of Depressed Anonymous meetings, it’s clear that the meetings create a secure base for those who in their childhood had neither kindness nor the life giving warmth and affection of family life.

People who keep coming back to Depressed Anonynmous continue to grow and become aware of the inner change taking place week after week as they find not only attention to their story, but find that they are loved and cared for at the same time. Possibly for the first time, they find that they look forward to each weekly meeting and become attached to the positive feelings that emerge inside themselves as they continue to share the story of their pain . In time, they share how their week is suddenly being filled with more good days than bad. It also becomes obvious to the participant that childhood behavior and experiences are carried right on into adult life. Trusting is such a hazard for the depressed because every person is different. You can’t trust your environment because it could suddenly shift and you would be without a certainty that you were bad and worthless. The meetings gradually present to you an opportunity to be someone worthwhile and valued. Your sharing and risking information about yourself begins the construction of a new and secure you. The Depressed Anonymous group becomes for possibly the first time in your life, a very secure and stable enviornmment where you can share, trust and grow.

RESOURCE: Depressed Anonynmous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Personal Stories. Pages 139-140.

The emotional wringer

We all know about the “emotional wringer” that A.A. speaks to us about  in the Twelve and Twelve. It is here that we  can read  the  St. Francis  Prayer  and how Bill W., the co-founder of AA recommends it to all those of us in recovery.

“Lord, make me a channel of thy peace – that where there is hatred, I may bring love – that where there is wrong, I may bring a spirit of forgiveness – that where there is discord, I may bring harmony -that where there is error, I may bring truth- that where there is doubt, I may bring faith- that where there is despair, I may bring hope – that where there is sadness, I may bring joy. Lord, grant that I may seek rather to comfort than to be comforted – to understand, than to be understood – to love, than to be loved. For it is by self forgetting that one finds.  It is by forgiving that one is forgiven. It is by dying that one awakens to eternal  life. Amen.”

Twelve and Twelve. Page 99.

To continue our discussion on the importance of prayer and meditation the Twelve and Twelve says:

“Perhaps one of the greatest rewards of meditation and prayer is the sense of belonging that comes to us. We no longer live in a completely hostile world. We are no longer lost and frightened and purposeless. The moment we catch even a glimpse of God’s will, the moment we begin to see truth, justice, and love as the real and eternal things in life, we are no longer deeply disturbed by all the seeming evidence to the contrary that surrounds us in purely human affairs. We know that God lovingly watches over us.We know that when we turn to Him, all will be well with us, here and hereafter.”

Twelve and Twelve. Page 105.

Comment: ” Praying means to ask for something. We ask that we might let God take over our lives since we have admitted that we are powerless over sadding ourselves and that our lives have become  unmanageable. As it says in Alcoholics Anonymous: I saw that it was my LIFE  that was unmanageable -not just my drinking (drugs, overeating,  sex-add your own).”

 

Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Page 97.

I had an addictive compulsion to depress myself!

“I very much like the whole spiritual orientation of the Twelve Step way of life–and just because we are a spiritual program doesn’t mean that we are denying the importance of other religious organizations or faiths. I feel that the greatest gift I have ever received is to know that I have an addictive compulsion to depress myself – it is this reality that brought me into the fellowship of DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS. It is here that I came into contact with and found a nonjudgmental  God who cares for me so much that God was willing to wait for me to reach out and receive such love.”

I became open, willing and honest to do what I needed to do to free myself from depression. Hugh

SOURCE: (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. Pages 95- 103. Step  Eleven.

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Copyright(c)Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups. DAP JUNE 13.

 

“There is a direct linkage among self-examination, meditation, and prayer. Taken separately, these practices can bring much relief and benefit. But, when they are logically related and interwoven, the result is an unshakeable foundation for life.” Bill W.

The 12 Steps have served as life giving signposts along the sometimes confusing journey of my life. Bill W., is right in that once we begin  to look deeper (self-examination)  into our beliefs, our thinking and how we live out these  realities  (behaviors), and then add to this our daily practice of conscious contact with God, our life truly becomes a prayer.

In my own recovery over these past 30 years, it was by my getting still , making conscious contact with my Higher Power, and living out the truth in my personal and communal life, that my surrender to its will for me, continues to give me freedom this very day.

Hugh

 

 

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When I place more value on my serenity

AFFIRMATION

 

” When I place more value on my serenity and sobriety than on anything else, I can maintain them at a higher level.”

REFLECTION

I have learned an amazing lesson in adopting the Twelve Step principles to my personal life. The more I let go of what I expect to happen and just relax, that which I expect happens. The message for me today is that I know that this program works for those who work the program. In the Twelve Steps I have found a healthy program where I find that the more I try and give up control over others, the more serenity and peace flows through me and out to others.

My fears seem to attract fear. I expect only to keep my mind and heart at peace by keeping my heart and mind on God.  I now believe that my love for God’s will, can bring that much more love to me.

MEDITATION

We pray that God will hear our plea and  that we might be able to live just for today!

SOURCE: (c) Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of Twelve Step groups. DAP. Louisville.

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I will be in touch with my feelings

AFFIRMATION

I will be in touch with my feelings throughout the day. I refuse to run from what I feel.

“..The ability to experience one’s feelings without resisting or running from them determines to a large degree whether a person is healthy or not.” (9)

REFLECTION

I am going to make a real effort to do what I see works in depressed persons like myself. They all say that the longer they are in the program, the more feelings they are able to express and the less the unpleasant feelings of fear dominates their lives. I am finding that by writing my feelings down, the less frightening they seem to be to me. I am now able to deal head on with my feelings. I find this experience to be a freeing one.

My addiction was a way of walling off pain. In time, I became addicted to the pain and in doing so, I lost myself in the process. Now the pain is more important than what I am running away from,..

What I experience in my life determines to a large extent what I predict life to become. My past experiences are predictors of a life not as yet lived. I am wanting to experience the fact that my good days are more frequent now and my bad days occurring not as often.

MEDITATION

God, the more I give up my need to be depressed the more I am finding that I am becoming more assertive and truly present to others in my life. I want you to help me feel my feelings and express them today. (Personal comments).

RESOURCES: Copyright(c) Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowships. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. June 9th.Page 116.

NOTICE:HIGHER THOUGHTS now available on KINDLE!

Take it wherever you go.

Faith– a Blueprint –and work.

“The idea of twenty-four living applies primarily to the  emotional life of the individual. Emotionally speaking, we must not live in yesterday, nor in tomorrow.

“But I have never been able to see this means the individual, the group, or A.A., (or Depressed Anonymous group) as a whole should give no thought whatever to how  to function tomorrow or even in the more distant future. Faith alone never constructed the house you live in. Faith had to be a blueprint and a lot of work to bring it into reality.

Bill W., in  As Bill Sees It. Page284.

The mind is a wonderful organ and more powerful and complex than the greatest computers made. In fact so many of us  who live to plan, organize and get things done, it is seemingly impossible to  produce anything without a blueprint. We have to have a plan, a business plan if we are business people, a  route to take, a personal vision that will make happen what we want to happen. Sometimes  one hears that we must just “let go and let God.” I  hope that what a person picks up here  is not that we just let God run our lives without input from us. That is not what is meant. Like Bill points out above, faith alone never built a house but combined with the energy/work of getting something done, that is where we must be. And so it goes with the Depressed  Anonymous mutual aid program of recovery. And this is true of all our 12 Step programs.

In DA we have a myriad of literature  offered to members where they can apply the Steps to their daily lives and gradually work their way out of the pit of depression. And if they stick to the plan as outlined in our Manual they will soon discover the truth of the Second Step, which tells us that we came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. And of course this takes work, a belief that we too can feel better if we do all that is suggested in the program. I know it is true and so do the thousands of those other folks who have worked the program.

But first we must have a faith that something good can happen to me just as it has happened to all those other people who by following the Twelve Step blueprint, have found themselves in a better place in every way.

If this is your first visit to find out what we are about and who we are we believe  that if you give yourself the time and effort to read our literature at our website, plus our newsletters, that you will begin to grasp what is possible for you just as it was for me. You will have  a blueprint that will definitely give you all the resources and tools to build a better life–without depression. That is a Promise!

Hugh

 

Have a Higher Thought today!

To cast out the darkness, familiar to all of us, we do have an options. We can either allow the dark side of our thinking to ruin our day or we can light a fire in our mind and have light and hope.

There are daily  uplifting  thoughts  to be found in  Higher Thoughts for Down days:365 daily thoughts  and meditations  for members of  12 Step fellowship groups,  now available on KINDLE e readers. In fact you can take all these wonderful thoughts with you on your KINDLE and they are as available anywhere and everywhere.

Light the light in your mind today and get hopeful. Higher Thoughts will give you something positive to think about and reflect upon as you go about your day.