DECISION 8: I WILL BE MORE ACCEPTING OF ANOTHER’S ANGER AND NOT ALWAYS TAKE IT PERSONALLY.
When you are both the focus and the cause of the person’s anger, you will need to find responses other than cutting yourself off from the person, by doing that, sharply reinforces your barrier of loneliness.
D.Rowe tells us that we find the cause of the anger and discuss the matter. For whatever reason for the anger, it might be best to write a letter the person. Or, Possibly, a friendly visit between the two of you will help solve the problem.
Making an apology when we see ourselves trapped, weak, worthless and hopeless, by making an apology to the person who caused the anger, seems frightening and humiliating.
Making amends, an apology to those we have injured us, seems gracious and creative, allowing a relationship to be strengthened and resumed.
In some families, there was no teasing, absolutely not. Maybe outside the family it might be allowed. Everything in the family was 100% serious. If a family member was teased, then this could result in a sulk and long term silence.
But in school, children might be teased, but never knowing how to tease back. We want to distinguish between friendly and malicious teasing. We could put bullying at the top of the list as one of the most harmful ways of malicious teasing. When I make an effort to get along with other people, distinguishing between friendly or imaginary teasing, this makes our relationship stronger, the other builds barriers.
TOMORROW DECISION 9: i WILL IMPROVE MY SKILL IN DISTINGUISHING BETWEEN REAL AND IMAGINARY ENEMIES.