It has been a while. It’s good to get back here and continue discussing some of the issues facing myself and my recovery from pneumonia. The main reason I’ve not written these past weeks is because I was in the hospital with a serious pneumonia. Finally, I was released on this past Tuesday, and was able to return home. Because I was in the hospital nine days my ability to walk was challenged. It’s like I had to learn how to walk all over again. So now, today, I am gradually feeling better and feeling more strength come back to my legs.
I had a lot of time to think, laying in bed and waiting for the next shot, blood being drawn, temperature taken, plus anything else that they could think to do to me. It took a week of tests to determine that not only were my lungs severely affected but the fact that my heart was severely affected as well. I think they call it erratic heartbeat. So now I came home with medicine that will help remedy the situation of the erratic heartbeat and having the lungs work the way they should. Now I can go back to work and try to lead a normal life again.
Over all, I realized in a new way the brevity of life and how much little time we have on this earth. So, I am thankful and grateful that I can continue my work supporting people who are depressed, suicidal and looking for hope. By the fact that I’ve been there many years ago, that is, depressed, I feel I have something important to give to you. And what I have to give to you is hope. Not a false hope. Not empty promises contrived and meaningless. But hope that gives life and a positive stamp on all that you are. We are more than our experience of depression. I want to give to you the legs that will help you walk along this road, and show others how you got where you are today.
When I first admitted to others and myself back in 1985 that my life was out of control so that I felt hollow and empty inside. I could see that there were no purpose in my life and all that I needed to do was to get up off the ground , dust myself off and began to walk. I began to walk with others like me who needed not only fellowship but who also needed a spiritual belief which they could put their trust in. They wanted a God that would help them– not judge them but would support them in learning how to walk again. I call this fellowship Depressed Anonymous, a mutual aid group using the 12 step program of recovery. A program that leads us step-by-step in a new way of living and a new way walking. We are walking with purpose. We are walking with direction. And we all are walking with the hand of God on our shoulders. You too can walk. You can walk out of your depression. It’ll take time and work. But just like now, my legs inactive for more than a week, the leg muscles atrophied and weakened me. This is somewhat an example of what happens to us when we are depressed. Many of us cannot get out of bed in the morning. Our sadness has immobilized us. It has taken away our motivation to walk. Today, now we have a way to walk. A new and hopeful way of looking at ourselves.
If you want to learn more about our way of walking with others and so gain support and aid from others — then you might want to look at our menu on our website here and read some of our blogs. You might also want to get to know more about who we are what we do. In fact, you might also look at some of our literature that give details about others like ourselves who are bedridden, and were unable to walk. Now they are walking. We are walking with hope and that passionate focus on staying upright and moving forward.
I just want to say thank you for reading this is short account of my journey in life where I learned how to walk again. So pray for me as I pray for you, and maybe we will have our paths cross and we will together be able to continue to support each other with our thoughts, love and prayers. Please come back again, and join us at this place. We want to hear from you and how you too want to learn how to walk using the 12 steps or recovery. We are with you!
SOURCE: (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition.(2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.