I want to share my reflections that I had this morning during my quiet time. As the eastern sky filled the horizon with the light of a morning sun my attention rested upon the silent figure of a bird alone on my backyard fence. It was motionless. Even though many of my backyard friends already were out and about my solitary bird continued to remain motionless as if it was in a deep trance.
Why I thought was this bird sitting all alone this morning? Usually, at least it was my understanding that that animals, insects and all other four legged and two legged creatures liked to stick together. You can count us in this category as well. We are all pretty much social creatures.
I must guess that even the hermit crab isn’t a hermit 24/7. But not knowing much about hermit crabs I would think they have some sort of gratifying social life. What do you think. Maybe someone reading this could shed some light on this matter. Thanks in advance.
Now back to this lonely bird. How do I know it’s lonely. I don’t, but seeing a bird that usually is pretty busy in the morning, got my attention this morning. Was the bird sad? Not feeling well? Just isolating himself to try and get his head together? Beats me as there is nothing wrong in trying to at least think about what’s up with this bird.
Is our friend the lonely bird ending up this morning in that closed system which is depression. Let’s be honest here. One of the areas of my own depression was the way I talked to myself. My thinking was my problem. My thinking changed the way I felt and the way I was feeling influenced my moods, and my moods influenced directly my behavior. And possibly I could venture to say that my friend this morning mimicked my own life when I was depressing myself. My thinking began to isolate me as I tried to figure out the reasons I was depressed. But most of all my negative thinking, hour after hour, day after day all came with these deep and sad feelings attached to them.
I guilted myself time and again with my irrational thinking so that my whole physical self began to shut down. I felt all alone, helpless and hopelesss. I thought I was all alone. And I just wonder if this bird this morning was feeling the same things I was feeling. All alone with no one to befriend him or understand.
As we continue to sort out, and separate the various areas of our lives, that is, our depression symptoms, we find that if we can put effort into looking at the way we think, which decidedly influences all our behaviors, we can pry open and gain entrance to the hidden source, with the other negative symptoms, such as the way we feel, think, and these areas (symptoms) taken as one piece, we find constructs the way we live out our lives. We are alone and we are isolated from any social life that would bring us into contact with others.
We know that this symptom of irrational thinking gradually pushes us deeper down into the direction of despair. Sometimes completing suicide. We want to get off the fence of indecision, seek help for our mistaken beliefs about our self, again that is feeling worthless, self bashing, feeling we are a failure, losing a love, all these thoughts and feelings. All these need to be brought out into the open and shared.
By examining the way we think, preferably in a group of persons just like ourselves there are those persons and others like them, who are found at every Depressed Anonymous meeting. For me the best way to break out of this deadly closed system of depression is to get off the fence and begin to open up your life to those who are now no longer alone, no longer living in fear, no longer imprisoned by the way they live, think and feel.
I hope that you might find help in the Depressed Anonymous Home Study kit where you will be able to find your mind and heart motivated to open up, examining areas of your life , looking at yourself square in the face, discovering and using the tools which can set you free.