If you happened to land on our Depressed Anonymous site here on the Internet and you think you are depressed, we have some thoughts to share with you.
First of all, we welc0me you.It’s not easy to admit that something is happening in our body and it is not getting better. What is it? Well, it has been over thirty years ago that I experienced those same feeling — gradually losing control over how I felt and finding myself sliding slowly down a slippery slope. I didn’t have a clue of what was happening to me. It was as if I could see myself, in slow motion, losing my grip on anything to hang onto. I couldn’t get enough sleep; lost weight; bashed myself continually for past personal situations that ended up badly in my life; lost girlfriend; guilt and shame filled my thoughts, every day and every hour. I think you get the picture.
And with all these negative emotions running through my veins –wouldn’t this bring any body down? And I was down.
Thank God, I already had begun a 12 Step program of recovery three years prior (for another addiction) to this experience with depression and I knew it had the power to help me out of this depression prison that I had me locked down.
Then I made a decision and admitted I had a problem and needed to act quickly or my sadness would completely put me down and out. I started walking five miles every day for weeks hoping this would take away this interminable jitteriness and anxiety that was keeping me less able to function. I knew that I couldn’t lose my job. But I couldn’t get out of bed as well. So, walking was a solution that I settled on. I would have to see a Doctor if the pain didn’t stop. In time it did stop. I came to believe that a Power greater than myself would restore me to sanity. I made a decision to do something. I knew if I moved the body, my mind would follow. For the past year my mind, body had been stuck in “park.”
Did I get better? Yes. And then I became a member of Depressed Anonymous and told people how the Steps can help one get better with the Steps and the fellowship of Depressed Anonymous.
By studying the Steps and reading the literature everyday, I finally understood what the depression experience will do to our relationships, our mind and our physical body. The one great advantage for me was the fact that I could talk to people just like myself. It takes one to know one. To have friends who neither put me down, or who thought I was crazy, or told me just to “snap out of it” was a great healing for me.
Slowly the mental fog lifted and I began to feel like my old cheerful self as I began to live in the freedom of that Power greater than myself who was now at the center of my life.
SOURCES: (C) Depressed Once-Not Twice (2002) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.
(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.