As we have been discussing ( 9/13-9/14) the Closed System of depression we are listing the issues that are part of each of the depression syndrome . Today I will focus my thoughts on how our motivation energy can break into the closed system and influence the whole circle of symptoms that make up the system. Divide and conquer.
We will take a negative issue and turn it into a positive mantra. When we are depressed, we don’t have the energy to do anything positive that would help us break the bonds of the sadness. That is why the saying MOTIVATION FOLLOWS ACTION is such an important part of my thinking and recovery. This commitment to begin taking responsibility for my recovery, prompts me to take a look at those issues of my life, which have kept me imprisoned and feeling hopeless.
First of all we are getting g motivated to look at what our day is to look like. Instead of lying in bed most of the day, and staying isolated, we are going to write down–yes write down- what we can do today to help us feel hopeful. Just doing this small little exercise may be the jump start that we need to get moving and active. Move the body and the mind will follow. I know this as fact. When I finally hit bottom, in every which way, I made the decision to do something that might help me get better. I began to walk every morning–rain or shine–and the more I got out early in the morning my motivation grew stronger. In my work, I’ll do it when I feel better (2016) paints a picture of many of us who say this to ourselves, then we never feel betterenough to get active . I didn’t feel better at first, but, like a muscle that is continually used, becomes stronger.
Planning ahead for the next 24 hours is a good way to live just for today and not live in the future tomorrows and the yesterdays. As you and I know, this is the problem, we don’t want to plan ahead. Why, we might ask. “I don’t have any hope that I will feel better–none at all.” When you are down in the pits, and the darkness shuts out the light, nothing seems hopeful. “Why plan? It won’t work for me.”
Have you ever dreaded the weekends when there are two days with nothing to do but stay at home and suffer. I found that if I became creative, and wrote down what I planned or wanted to do for the weekend , hour by hour, and actually did what I planned, this in itself would be a motivator to get active. We all need to plan something positive in our lives –and this applies especially on those days when we may not be working but have found ourselves alone and isolated staring at the walls.
Plan your day or it will plan you! Is this what is happening in your life? Don’t beat yourself up with the cycling thoughts that you will never get out of this dark pit, that the future is too bleak. Iinstead focus on the possibility that something good can happen for you. I know. I thought I was losing my mind because I couldn’t concentrate on or remember any thing that I might have just read. Somehow though, the exercise, the distractions as I went round and round inside the mall, all kept at bay that terrible hollow feeling that kept gnawing in my gut. I didn’t give up. I kept on walking. I surely felt like Forrest Gump. But my motivation to keep on walking worked.
And now some reflections on the above statements. You can see from what I have written that the more motivated I became the more my thinking became clearer and positive. Also, my behavior brought me out of isolation so that I got better at making decisions for myself and my day. I had the choice to stay alone and isolated or get out of myself and talk to friends. This is why those of us who are in the fellowship of Depressed Anonymous receive daily support when we need it as well as gaining new insights from members of the group who are walking the same steps as am I.
Motivation has a large role to play in my life. The closed system no longer has me isolated and hopeless, but now, by dealing with the symptoms of my illness, they cannot keep me in “lockdown.” The system is no longer closed. We have pried it open.
Believe that you–that you now have the key to serenity. You can see the symptoms, and you can turn the negatives of each around so that by doing the opposite of the negative your own life can be turned into a positive adventure. You would do well to read a book written by the depressed titled Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) , published by Depressed Anonymous Publications. A HOME STUDY KIT IS ALSO AVAILABLE. Visit the store here for more info.
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