INSANITY IS DOING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND EXPECTING DIFFERENT RESULTS.

How true. It’s like being around persons who are continually toxic (negative) and for us to try and make them happy. Or someone in the family smokes and we  tell them they need to quit smoking. And how has that worked for you?   Or someone who continues to pig out on junk food day after day and who is obese and you try to have them change their eating habits. How  has that worked out for you?  But you say, we have our own problems.

Today I tell myself, like all the days past, I am going to make a change in the way I  talk to myself. You know, all those thoughts which keep circling in our minds, like the proverbial  merry-go-round, riding  our horse, bobbing up and down,  going nowhere, and telling ourselves we must get off before we fall off.   And….what do we do? Yep, we  keep riding this bobbing up and down horse. Again, we tell ourselves, I’ll do it when I feel better;  When I have the time, the money for counseling, the friend who will listen to me forever and not run away like all the rest of those who said  they were my friends. Where do you go after the continual self speak which pounds in to our heads thoughts voicing how  I am unacceptable to myself and everyone else. Another horse (thought)  that I ride that bobs me up and down is the one that tells me how bad and unacceptable that I am.

How do I keep from riding a dead horse? Get off!

In Step Two, and the commentary which tells us all about this Step Two in our DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS BOOK — “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity,” we learn some things about the compulsivity of sadness that has gripped our minds and our whole physical self. The insanity of our thinking continues to make us feel helpless and hopeless. I got off the merry-go-round years ago. At times I almost bought a ticket and got back on but then I remembered I had a “toolbox” which continues to provide me with a spiritual and Step by Step  program  to NOT get trapped into the maddening, insane way that caused so much pain in the past.  DO YOU WANT TO GET OFF THE MERRY-GO-ROUND OF INSANITY?

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Books from Depressed Anonymous  Publications which can help: Depressed Anonymous, Third edition, 2011. Also, I’ll do it when I feel better.”

A POWER GREATER THAN OURSELVES

I love that statement.  A few times with my work in the prison system I ran across one or two individuals who said  that they didn’t believe in God. No one fell off their chairs when that statement was made. Like, this wasn’t a church meeting by any mean. I remember the one man telling us that the Depressed Anonymous group was his Higher power. It was this group that met every week in which he could share the ups and downs of his prison life. The group was there when he needed them and who shared their own stories of pain and the need for  the fellowship’s support. 

Was I a prisoner?  Well, like all persons depressed, I felt that I was in continual lock down.I felt that my own isolating  behavior prevented me,  by my own feelings of shame and guilt to remain locked up behind the bars of fear and anxiety.  But I also knew that we all were kindred spirits.  We all experienced or were experiencing the pain of depression.  We all were fighting this thing together. We knew that we were all equal in this fellowship. Even though I did not live my life in a physical prison, I knew that my own isolation and fear kept me chained to my past. The new me, thanks to a gradual spiritual awakening, and dependence upon my Higher Power and  support of the fellowship of my Depressed  Anonymous group, I finally moved out of the dark world of depression.

I do hope as time goes by to put emphasis upon this Power greater than ourselves. And what is the Power? How do you contact it? How does one  “…come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity? STEP TWO OF DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS

For a refresher, you might like to go to our website menu where you can read THE PROMISES OF DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS. I know these Promises to be true ..they happened for me.

PRAY, BUT KEEP ROWING TO SHORE! GRAB AN OAR!

Some days I feel like my life is like that small boat on the ocean. I watch as the swirling waves and the thunderous noise of waves and wind wash over me. I watch as my small boat takes on water. No land is in sight. What to do? I pray. Have you ever had these feelings of helplessness? Well, let me tell you, I have had this experience more than I would like to admit.
One time in my life, one very difficult time for sure, I thought that my boat was sinking and that there was no recourse –no land in sight. This is when that deadening feeling of melancholia (depression) –like the Pac Man arcade game – began to chew me up. I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t know what exactly. The time to row, so to speak, was when I couldn’t get myself out of bed and knew that I had to get to land, get my body moving, the best way that I could. I had to keep rowing.
Gradually, by walking everyday, and forcing myself to do what I didn’t want to do, like exercise, I gradually regained my balance. And after a year of this activity (rowing) I began to notice that the wind howling around me gradually subsided. My boat was still afloat and I could see land. Safety. This all happened almost thirty years ago.
It was then that my 12 Step life began. Now, with each new day, before the sun pops up over the horizon, my day begins with prayer and the centering of my thoughts. In our program of recovery we call this a meditation experience. I then read the Higher Thoughts for this day. I also read the Depressed Anonymous book, plus entering thoughts in the Depressed Anonymous Workbook. All this is accomplished in that first hour of the day. I feel like I truly am now on solid rock. And it’s like I take these morning thoughts and with them begin my day. With Step Two … I “came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” So this morning, I continue to “make a decision to turn my life and my will over to the care of God as we understand God to be.”
Turning my life over to to the care of God doesn’t mean I lay back and see what God is going to do…no, it means that I do my work and God will do his. And so I keep on rowing. Grab an oar!