THREE OF THE WORLD’S WORST EXCUSES. HOW WE RESIST CHANGE WITH OUR NEGATIVE SELF TALK!

” But I’ve always done it this way.”

“But I have always been this way.”

“This is just how I am.”

Stuck!  How often does someone tell us one of the above excuses or all of the above on first showing up at a Depressed Anonymous meeting.  They tell us that they are “sick and tired of being sick and tired.”  They come to those of us who have said the same thing in the past. Like those  who stick with the fellowship of persons like themselves, persons depressed, they learn how   our lives were before participating in our program of recovery and how our life is today.  The change that we talk about is like night and day.   The BEFORE describes a life of darkness and despair and the NOW describes a   life filled with light and hope.

Now, by using the four stage process of change: 1. Be aware 2) Be motivating 3) Be doing 4) Be maintaining  we can examine our past. We begin to see how our excuses which keep us imprisoned in depression many times originate growing up in a dysfunctional family. This  loss of trust and love and in   some cases,  even loss of provision for basic survival needs such as food, shelter and physical  safety, conditions us to a feeling of being helpless and depressed. Sometimes this chronic depression is masked and defended against by compulsive activity and perfectionistic kinds of striving. Becoming “tireless” and “limitless caretakers of others defends a person against his or her own neediness and yearning to be care for.

So, how can we promote a positive change? How does this change come about?  Well, first of all, we admit we have a problem. For some of us, a life-threatening problem. We became aware something is wrong. Then  we believed that we had to do something about this problem. We came to the DA group. We discovered that the members of the group learned how  to motivate themselves and get into action. We found a way that gave us hope. We found a map that continues to lead us out of the darkness.  Finally, one’s motivation is followed by action. We got into action  and   continued to find ways to change ourselves.  We have the tools  to change our selves,  one Step at a time. We are no longer alone. No more excuses.  We now have a solution.  How about you?

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