“I believe that because so many sights, sounds and situations have been connected with sad feelings in my early years that today these same sights, smells and sounds trigger the same feeling in me today. It is automatic. I have learned that over time and with working one’s recovery program that one’s sad feelings become less and less and one’s more pleasant feelings begin to dominate.” Copyright. (c) Higher Thoughts for down days. May 11.
I remember so well the painful feelings that accompanied my descent into that bottomless pit which we call depression. The frightening and unstoppable descent with all its pain and anxiety continued to work its paralyzing effect on my whole body. There seemed to be nothing that I could do to eradicate these feelings of “jitteriness” and anxiety. Even though there are no such feelings as bad or good, these feelings have energy which can produce unpleasant or pleasant emotions. Feelings are produced by our thoughts, either conscious or unconscious, and these feelings produce moods, which gradually effect our behaviors. So, in my own time of being depressed, what was once my active life, suddenly turned sullen and static. I could no longer force myself to get out of bed a morning and it was all I could do to force myself to get up and moving.
My thinking was totally barren of hope. It was gradually apparent to me that I had better do something soon, if I was to survive. It was then that I forced myself to get up, get out of bed and initiate a walking program. What once was no big deal in my life, namely walking, now served as the way out of my depression. In time my feelings changed from that persistent and painful hollowness and jitteriness, to those of an inner calmness and serenity. And my thinking, now anchored by hope and a walking program that was producing its’ positive effect with pleasant feelings, once a normal part of my life now retuned. I have remained depression free ever since that time which now has reached more than thirty years. For that I am grateful to the program of Depressed Anonymous and my daily living out the spiritual principles of 12 Step recovery.
SOURCES: Believing is seeing: 15 ways to leave the prison of depression.
Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition.
I’ll do it when I feel better.
Higher Thoughts for down days.
Depressed Once -Not twice. An autobiography of the spiritual journey out of depression.
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