Category Archives: Uncategorized

A litany for living life on life’s terms.

These affirmations can produce in us positive feelings, with a desire to make the most of our day’s activities. Please take a few moments after each affirmation to see how these can best be brought to life.

I will live my life today with daily positive affirmations of who I desire to be. Pause.
I will live my life in service to others today. Pause.
I will live my life today with compassion for others. Pause.
I will live my life today in discovering God’s will for me and not my own. Pause.
I will live my life today in being empathic with those hurting and isolated. Pause.
I will live my life today in being thankful. Pause.
I will live my life today in prayerful moments throughout this day. Pause.
I will live out my life today by being a friend to those isolated by depression. Pause.
I will live out my life today with courage and hope. Pause.
I will live out my life today by being generous with my time and talents for our fellowship. Pause.
I will live out my life today in the present moment. All I have is today’s 24 hours. Pause
I will live out my life today with a quiet and receptive mind to the promptings of my HP. Pause.
I will live out my life today on life’s terms. Pause.
I will live out my life today in simplicity and truth. Pause.
I will live out my life today without a need to control others. Pause.
I will live out my life today with the firm belief that God loves me just the way I am. Pause.

“I would rather one should walk with me rather than merely telling me.”

The author Edgar Guest got it right. He would rather have someone walk with him rather than merely telling him. How true this is for our own lives. An example: I went to a large store whose layout I was unfamiliar. I asked a clerk how to find an item. “Oh yea, ” she responded — “I think it’s in aisle 57.” I was in aisle three so I walked to aisle 57. I looked everywhere – I spent some time up and down the aisle — no luck it wasn’t in aisle 57.
I went and asked another clerk. She told me that my item was in another aisle. She asked me to follow her and we walked back to aisle 57. There was my item. I thanked the clerk for helping me and I told her that I wasn’t familiar with the store layout. “No problem.”

In our program of recovery we always want to make ourselves available to those who have questions about the program, who need more information about the Steps and just another person to talk with between meetings. I get that. Those who volunteer to help those who need our assistance sometimes become a sponsor of others, or partner together in the Depressed Anonymous Workbook. We look forward to sharing our own experiences with others, especially our “newbies.” Our help can be so valuable as we share our own story and how I too have come to my first meeting and found someone willing to help walk with me through the Steps.

At our Depressed Anonymous online meetings, the chair person shares how anyone wanting to have someone to talk with between meetings, can find the names and phone numbers on the screen for handy reference. I highly recommend this.

The Depressed Anonymous Workbook is a positive tool where a new member and a group member can share and walk this path together. For some it has completely changed their lives…including the friend and the sponsor. You will be glad you did.

Hugh

At a loss of words to describe emotion?

Sometimes I’m so out of touch with my emotions I can’t even come up with a word to describe it. I found this resource online that helps me to put my emotions into words. It’s not a perfect tool but it can help me to better describe what I’m going through.

If you can’t describe your emotion use this tool to try out different words. Sometimes putting a word to an emotions lessens it to some small degree. By using a word we can create a small gap between who we are and the emotion that we are feeling. I tend to run from my emotions and stuff them by acting out in some fashion. I’m still working on not using food to soothe my emotions, but I’m a work in progress.

I hope you find this tool useful. Give it a try and see if it works. If it works, great – you’ve found a tool that works for you. If it doesn’t work for you, great – you now know this tool is not right for you.

Yours in recovery, Bill R

emotion_word_wheel

Life is starting to come together

As I began working on the abuse issues in therapy, the pieces of my life began to fit together in a way they could never have before, as I had never dealt with this catastrophic event. In the book Depressed? Here is a way out! (now Depressed Anonymous) the author talks about how people find their time of depression to be one of the great gifts of their life. The first time I read this, I thought it was the craziest thing I have ever heard. Yet, during this time of depression, I have learned and have I grown. I have come to understand myself and my God in a way I never could before.

It has been nearly a year now. Life is starting to come together for me again, one day at a time by the grace of God and the fellowship of this program. For the very first time I walked through the doors of Depressed Anonymous, I knew that I was in the right place. Having been an active member of Alcoholics Anonymous for so many years, I worked the Steps with my sponsor. I was already a firm believer of the Twelve Steps. I attended meetings: I worked the Steps with my sponsor. I used the Depressed Anonymous phone list and talked to those people about my pain and my day to day problems. I read the book and followed the instructions given in it.

When God, through Depressed Anonymous, the program and the fellowship literally carried me through the darkest time in my life and he did not let me die. I have fully experienced the “miracle of the group.” I have heard it said that sometimes God’s greatest miracles are unanswered prayers. I believe it. After all I am one.
– ANONYMOUS
Resource
(c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. pgs. 119-120.

A key that opened many doors

The following is an excerpt of a testimony of how a person hospitalized for depression found and used the key for her recovery.

“During my first night in the hospital, a member of Depressed Anonymous informed me of a support group known as Depressed Anonymous. I decided to give it a try. By telling me about the wonderful, miraculous and very spiritual program, this person had not only worked the Twelfth Step, but had given me a key, a key which would open many doors for me. Walking through these doors was like admitting defeat. I was playing first base in a ball game in which I would eventually win. If I struck out, I was back on Step One. By playing ball with a positive attitude, I was allowing my Higher Power to walk the Steps to recovery with me. With the help and the positive sense of fellowship that I enjoyed in the group. I began to understand God’s will for me. With the love, support and true friendship of three faithful members in the group, I began working on my driver’s license, which had been another step toward independence for me. Within a year, I earned my license when two members of the group took me in for my road test. A new sunnier life had begun for me. The worst was finally over.”

– Excerpted from: “We never talked about our feelings,” in a personal story by Lena

Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition, © 2011 Depressed Anonymous Publications, Louisville, KY. Page 112.

An old saying

Note: originally published December 23, 2015

There is an old saying that goes like this: “When my ship came in, I was at the airport!” How true. How many opportunities in my life have I passed up because I kept telling myself, “I’ll do it when I feel better.” Just recently I wrote about this in my book I’ll do it when I feel better because that was my personal mantra when I was depressed. I would rather sit and do nothing. I just wanted to try and think my way out of the unending thoughts that kept me imprisoned. I sat in the prison of my own making. I was chasing hopeless thoughts around in my mind.

I always wanted to escape the pain – but not just now. The work that I knew which was involved was too much for me to even consider. I had no energy to speak of. Getting out of bed in the morning took a superhuman efforts and somehow, magically, I mistakenly thought I was going to be OK. I kept doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. This is insane.

But finally, when my ship came in, I was standing on the pier waiting for it, and I knew that I had to climb aboard. How did this event come about? Well, it came about when I knew I could wait no longer for help to come to me. I had to make a decision to go after it. No matter how big or how small, any ship would do. I had to get on board. Then it happened. I had to make a choice – stay in my misery which was predictable and unending or to go and find something, somebody that could help me live a life which was truly unpredictable and that I could live my life in peace and hope. The name of that ship is not the “good ship lollipop” but the ship is a vessel of hope called The Depressed Anonymous Fellowship. The sailors on this ship are tried and true, having endured all sorts of trials and perils of life, who have found this vessel of hope to be seaworthy and a life support. All we need to do is admit that we have to get aboard this ship. Will you like to join us on this voyage we call life? Would you like to find yourself on calm seas? If so, a ship is coming for you. Get aboard and live.

See our book, Depressed Anonymous – it’s my and your passport to safety and serenity.

Order it today. VISIT THE STORE here at our site and learn more about what we in this Fellowship have to offer those who feel there is no hope. And adrift. Grab an oar!


Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

A culture of comfort

Note: originally published March 21, 2016

In the past, my response to a situation that needed my attention I would tell myself “I’ll do it when I feel better.” This was my “old normal” behavior for making excuses for NOT taking care of business in my life.

I believe that for most of us who were or are depressed the “normal” behavior was to just sit in the comfort of doing nothing and letting our lives spin out of control. Now when I mean comfort, I don’t mean without pain, I mean taking NO action when action is seriously needed. And it was only when the situation , that depressing paralysis of will and life activity began to come to a deadening halt, that I had to face myself, make a decision to do something and get my body moving.

I believe that when I unexpectedly found myself drifting down into a sort of a deadly physical inertia, that this discomfort, this slow motion moving and thinking, forced me to come to my senses and stop whatever it was that had me sinking in quicksand up to my chin.

How many times have persons shared with me, as well as sharing in the Depressed Anonymous group, that the comfort of staying stuck in neutral was better than trying to dig themselves out of the stagnation of depression. Depressed persons sometimes have the fear that their unending physical sadness , their mental torment and the comfort of doing nothing is better than trying to change it for fear that they might get something far worse. In fact, many felt that to change would be like turning themselves into the hole in the doughnut. They would be reduced to zero.

Like it says in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, most times we all are looking for an easier and more comfortable way out of whatever has us by the throat. Why not stay in the cocoon of our predictable misery than try to live in the real world which is unpredictable and challenging. Of course, to live this way, takes energy. To live this way takes hope and the belief that I can and I will take the plunge to be proactive in doing all that I can to feel differently. I also have come to the point where I will make a “decision ” to take action today, not tomorrow, but today. Today is all that I have. I have just 24 hours at a time to begin deciding to live differently and find out how this can be accomplished. Where to start.

Just by reading this piece today, you can find the hope and energy to turn your life around like thousands other have done over the years.

Read the following literature and see how it may be of help to you in leaving your own “comfort zone”.

SOURCES:

    • Copyright (c) Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.
    • Copyright (c) I’ll do it when I feel better (2014) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.

Please VISIT THE STORE at this site for information for ordering your own copies of valuable literature on ways to leave behind the misery of your own depression experience.

Untying knots

How many times have I spent untying knots, from shoestrings to the reel on the fishing rod, the line erupting in a ball of tangled line. The lesson here is that untying knots is a metaphor for life. I knew from experience that if I stayed with trying to untangle the knot that I would eventually succeed. That happens to be true for the shoestrings –but not so much for the fishing line. I usually had to cut the line, pull out the tangled ball of line and use the line that was left.

Life is like this when a situation arises that needs our immediate attention, we either deal with it, or tell ourselves that there is nothing we can do to change it. We’ll just try and live with it. That doesn’t work very well for either shoestrings or fishing line. Cutting the fishing line and/or the shoestrings is not the best solution but it does take care of our knotted line and tangled shoestrings.

If you are experiencing some tangled knots in your life: depression, despair, divorce, and just all over emotional pain, now is the time to ask for help. We ask if there is someway or someone to help me untie my hard to live with problems? Is the solution just to cut off my lifelines of family and friends? We say no! If you need help now in untying a knot, such as a sadness that continues to spiral you downward, leaving you feeling adrift and hopeless, we can help you find a way out where you can connect with others like yourself.

A mutual aid group is available for those of us who have learned how to overcome our hopelessness and skilled at untying knots in our lives. We are skilled because we are with those others who have been busy cutting the lines of their own attachments to self bashing, feeling worthless and living in isolation.
Throw out a line and we will be there for you. You are not alone. “There is hope….and we do recover.” (The name of one of our Depressed Anonymous ZOOM groups).

WE have our Depressed Anonymous meetings everyday online at SKYPE and ZOOM, please come and join us. Check out our homepage for more information about our groups, online.
Please contact us with an email at depanon@netpenny.net.

For more information check out our literature at our website www.depressedanon.com.
Thank you,
Hugh, for the fellowship.

Lack of power, that was our dilemma!

In our “Big Book” Depressed Anonymous, we learned that not having the power to escape from depression was our main problem.

What gives many of us the power to overcome depression is to have some new purpose or find new meaning for our lives. In my own life I found that the best way to keep those low moods and depressive symptoms at arm’s length is to write. One day I stumbled across this great solution for my own wellness and rehabilitation – among many. Most times in the past when I felt discouraged and in a funk mood, I would seek out my pillow and rest. Too many times my escape from the mental and physical fatigue would be to hit the sack.

I gave up that moment which in time became my power to get on with that moment which gave meaning to me like no other.

Thinking causes feelings, feelings cause moods and moods cause behavior.

This sounds right for me. When my thinking is negative and my mind cycles around and around, these negative thoughts can create sad feelings which are negative. If I feel sad enough and for prolonged periods of time my sad feelings will create moods which can last for a short time or deepen into moods which gradually darken our thinking to the extent that hopelessness begins to rule our emotions-our lives. Once our moods deepen, we begin to find ourselves prisoners, not of any iron bars and locked cells, but the change in our thinking, now negative and hopeless , not only will change our behaviors so that any physical, mental or spiritual activities will come to a halt All those activities that were once such a large part of our lives, providing pleasure for us, gradually have all disappeared. From this time on, our thinking, our feelings, frozen with fear and anxiety are stuck in a place which is unable to provide any possible solutions providing a predictable escape.