We have our identity in the process of depressing. We are afraid that if we stop, we won’t know how to be, won’t know who to be, won’t know what life will expect.
It’s safer and more comfortable to continue with the depressing than to risk freedom
Is this depressing?
Can I realize I do this (reject well-being) without being depressed about it?
It’s depressing to realize that I’ve spent my whole life depressing myself.
The most important part is that I’ve thought it was external. Now I’m getting the sense that it is something I’ve learned to do and now to do to myself.
To say this is depressing information is like saying that you are on a sinking ship and you have just discovered a lifeboat.
You can stand there and be upset that this ship is sinking or you can take the lifeboat.
We’re talking about being compassionate with yourself because everything else springs from that.
It is not selfish to love yourself.
If you can’t find compassion for yourself, you’ll never find it for anyone else. You won’t know how. You will never be truly generous to anyone else. You won’t know how. You will never be truly generous to anyone while depriving yourself.
The reason we don’t tell anyone they should do this is that a person won’t do this until they are ready.
Most people never will in their life.
All we’re saying is that when you’re ready here’s the way you can do it. This definitely is not another stick to beat yourself.
When you’ve suffered enough, you’ll remember that you know how to do it. It doesn’t really matter what you have thought, believed, felt or done before.
This is a new day.
“But I’ve always done it this way.” “But I’ve always been this way.” “This is just the way I am.”
These are three of the world’s worst excuses.
It’s OK to change.
It’s OK to try something new.
It’s OK to try something radically new…There isn’t really anything new because if you try it and don’t like it, you can always return to how you were doing it before. No problem. No shoulds. Trying anything once or twice doesn’t mean you have ever to do it again if you don’t want to.
And not taking a risk because you are afraid is a grave disservice to yourself. Fear is not the problem. You can have your fear and allow it to stop you or you can have your fear and risk anyway. Either way, the fear is there. The choice is yours.”
Sources: The Depressed Anonymous Workbook. (2001) DAP. Louisville. Pgs.45-46.
Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) DAP. Louisville.
Believing is seeing: 15 ways to leave the prison of depression. (2015) DAP. Louisville.
I’ll do it when I feel; better. (2014) DAP. Louisville