Category Archives: Spirituality

12 Step Meeting, Acceptance, DA Literature, Depressed Anonymous, Depressed Anonymous Workbook, Fellowship, Journaling, Purpose, Spirituality, The 12 Steps

I can’t do anything to remove my compulsive behavior until I choose to live without it!

December 14, 2019 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

REFLECTION

I know that I have to continue to work on myself and the way that I speak to myself on an ongoing and daily basis. My letting go and let God take over my life doesn’t mean that I’ll just sit back and let God do all the work. No, it means that I will work on myself and leave the outcome up to my Higher Power. I know that my life can be lived differently if I make the effort to choose to become conscious of the thoughts that I let myself ruminate and think about during my day. The more I monitor my thoughts, the more I am able to filter out the negative thoughts and have them replaced with positive and constructive thoughts.

So often, when I am depressed I continue a thinking style that was learned as a small child. I am not even counscious as to how I would always select the negative attribute about myself to reflect upon, instead of thinking positive and hopeful thoughts about myself and my relationships. The more I believe that I have a choice as to how I am to feel, the more I become conscious of the thoughts that influence the way I feel.

BECOMING MINDFUL

God, let me just for today, dwell on your mercy and kindness that you desire to bestow on us. We pray that our awareness of your love for us will free us from our sadness.

Resources:

(c) Higher Thoughts for down days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups. Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY December 14th.

Put a HIGHER THOUGHT in your life every day. A spiritual vitamin will increase your spiritual metabolism so that you begin to replace negative thinking with thoughts of hope and serenity.

You may order online from the Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore at www.depressedanon.com

12 Step Meeting, DA Literature, Fellowship, Spirituality

Depressed or unhappy?

May 23, 2019 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

Depressed Anonymous bases its healing and recovery on the premise that once depressed persons admit they are out of control, even to the extent of attempting suicide, they come to believe that a power greater than themselves can restore them to sanity, while at the same time, making a decision to turn their minds and wills over to the care of God, as they understand God,

The God, as we under stand God, is what appeals to more and more persons as we admit our helplessness over our compulsive, depressive thoughts, actions, or behaviors. We feel we have lost all control over everything including our thinking. The depressed person is aware that their unpleasant thinking is a cyclical and spiraling process where there is never a respite. This obsession, driven by one’s one feelings of guilt, shame and worthlessness is the fuel that that continues our own isolation. This experience is not so much a psychopathology as it is a way for the human spirit to comfort itself. The depression is more of a disease of isolation and being disconnected than a biological disorder.

The Twelve Step program helps people to become God conscious. It is in working the program while making no excuses for the spiritual nature of our recovery. We can begin to attribute our new found sense of hope and peace to the Higher Power. For the active member of Depressed Anonymous, there begins to glimmer in the distance the bright light of hope.

By recognizing how it feels to be depressed, more people will have the help and guidance that will get them through their depression. Lives will be saved as well. Besides reading the Twelve Steps at each meeting, the group learns on a firsthand basis about the “miracle of the group.” It is in the sharing and getting connected with the other members of the group where one’s recovery begins.

RESOURCES:

Please click onto The Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore for more information on Depression, spirituality and recovery.

Fellowship, Hope, Service, Spirituality, Step 01, The 12 Steps

Stepping out of hopelessness

May 15, 2019 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

One of the greatest feelings I experienced in confronting my depression was that I began to have hope. I began to believe what others were saying about the Steps. They were telling me that the plan that they followed everyday of their lives was giving them a positive feeling that they were going to step out of the swamp of sadness and hopelessness. In fact, those who spoke these encouraging words already were manifesting the strength and power of the 12 Steps in their own lives. I was one of these people.

A question that continued to cross my mind during my period of pain and isolation was basically “is life worth living.” Many folks depressed still debate this question in their minds. And far too many have provided us their answer that “life is not worth it.”

This has been my mission over these past years to show by example of other’s recovery (plus my own) that with appropriate faith, work and the spiritual tools, life can be good again. There is a faith, a strong indomitable spirit at the core of every human being, that hope is available to all who seek it.” What you seek, will seek you.” It’s almost akin to the belief in Karma–as you give out so will you receive back–in some way, at some time in your own life experiences. I don’t know how or why, but I do know that it just works out that way.

When I was first introduced to the 12 Steps, I came to my first meeting, willing to learn what I could to recover fully from my addiction. I had to have hope that something would work. It would have to work for me. And members of this 12 Step group presented me stories, facts and situations where persons completely down and out, physically, mentally and spiritually found hope in the confusion and despair of their own hopelessness and became free.

No longer did we feel hopeless of finding a way out of what was killing us. Yes, “we” found a way out. The plan was before us and the group was behind us as we plodded along, each of us supporting the other til we finally completed our Steps. We now share how our stepping into hope continues to be the North star for me these past thirty plus years for my own life.

Is life worth living? For many years now I discovered how a faith, a strong belief in my Higher Power, and a bonded group of men and women have continued to travel the same path as my own.

If you want more information about our group Depressed Anonymous please check out our website at www.depressedanon.com for a full explanation of who we are and what we do. You’ll want to step out with us.

Fellowship, Spirituality

The prescription for sanity in one’s life.

May 8, 2019 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

This idea of choosing sanity is what we desire. Who would ever choose insanity? But, believe it or not, people choose insanity all the time. You remember the saying, “doing the same thing over and over again is insanity.” If you are honest with yourself, I think you might remember a time when you yourself kept doing something that was assuredly insane. Today, if you can honestly say that you always choose sanity, then my response to you is that is a good thing. I am happy for you.

In our 12 Step program of recovery we learn about the 2nd Step, “Came to believe that a power greater than myself can restore me to sanity.” Now for most of us, like it says in the 12 &12 and 12 Traditions, written by Bill W., co-founder of AA, sanity “means soundness of mind.” Now here is the point, when I was in the throes of depression, I was scared and I really did think that I was losing my mind. I could not concentrate. My feelings and emotions were flowing through me like a river overflowing its banks. My thoughts always circled back on themselves, making a tight grip-like on every thought that flowed from my mind. I was in a circular round dance – without a partner. I would try to think my way out of my depression. What was happening to me I thought? The more I thought, the more I got tangled up in my own mental fog. After the mental wrestling which went on in my mind, hour after hour and day after day, I begin to wonder if there was any way out of this labyrinth. The paths led to places which indicated that there was no exit. I began to believe there was no way out and so my daily recourse/solution was to sleep. Sleep was the only thing that would deaden the assault on my mind.

Many times my own mind goes back to the time when as a therapist I tried to help others break down their life choices into small pieces. When I was depressed, all I could think of was a wall, a huge wall that would show up, every time I wanted to go and try to figure out a solution for my problem. And it was here that I would continue the insane banging my head against a wall that would not let me gain entrance. But when I began to break the symptoms of my depression into smaller parts and take a closer look at where the solutions might lie. I discovered a way out of my own prison by this method and it gradually provided hope for me. I discovered that what I needed to do was to utilize some of these ” tools ” as a way out of the prison of depression and gave me a gradual exit out of my prison. Instead of going over and over in my mind on how bad or worthless I was, I began to cut off these self-bashing thoughts with hopeful designs on making a new me. No more was I engaged in that insane circular thinking that provided no solutions, but instead, always sent me right back to square one from where I started. Insanity! It was like a dog chasing its tail. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Sorry, it doesn’t happen that way when we are with a group of people at a Depressed Anonymous meeting. We all have experienced the type of thinking that puts us deeper in the lowest mood possible. It is the group experience and the spiritual principles of the Steps that help us to spiral upwards into wholeness and sanity.

One of the great lessons that I have learned over the years is listening to those persons who share their stories of hope. They tell the stories of their own recovery sharing with us how they used all the “tools” at their disposal for their own recovery

.(See Tools of Recovery at our website Menu where you will find a list of many of the effective tools for extricating oneself from depression. You will be able to use ” sane” tools as a means of rejecting the insanity of our own lives and making sense out of how to live a life without depression. A life with hope. It happens.)

Also read the many stories in our Depressed Anonymous “Big Book” Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville.KY). Personal testimonies section.

More information at the Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore.

Order are accepted online.

Acceptance, DA Literature, Fear, Fellowship, Spirituality, Victim Thinking

Healthy Adulthood? What is it?

March 19, 2019 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

Saint-Exupery, in The Little Prince said “that to be a man, a woman, an adult, is to accept responsibility. And during those years that are bracketed by the dawning of conscience and end of adolescence (seven to ten) we must be slowly expanding the dominion of what we can be responsible for – becoming our own grownup.”

A Higher Thought for Today/ March 19.

AFFIRMATION

Remove the letters “d”, “e”, and “I” from the word depression and I have “press on’!

“The idea that we have to be responsible for ourselves and that the ways of the world are neither good nor just, is too terrifying for you to contemplate. You cannot tolerate such uncertainty. You do not trust yourself, so how can you take responsibility for your self? ” Bill W.

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

I don’t like facing the fact that ultimately I am the one responsible for myself, no one else. It appears to me that I have to take care of myself, depend on my Higher Power for direction, and go from there. My Higher Power isn’t going to do it all. I know that I have to do all that I can to restore my life and my feelings. God is the rudder to my boat and I have to put my oars into the water if I am to get moving in the right direction.

I am attempting, day by day, to tolerate the unpredictableness of my life and gradually learn new ways to cope with uncertainty. While I am depressing myself, I want everything to be perfect and under my control. I know now that I will be happier when I learn how to tolerate a pleasant mood without telling myself that it will not last!

MEDITATION

We believe that the closer that we come to God, as we understand God, as we understand Him, the closer our God draws to us. We believe that whatever we want changed in our life, this can best be accomplished by approaching the God of our understanding and letting the power greater than ourselves steer us across the stormy sea.”

SOURCE: Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 Daily Thoughts and Meditations for Members of 12 Step fellowship groups. Hugh Smith. Depressed Anonymous Publications. (1997) Pages 47-48. Louisville. Ky.

RESPONSIBILITIES AND CONNECTIONS
We have to acknowledge that I am the one who is having the harsh and negative thoughts about myself, and that I alone must take responsibility for the feelings that I have about myself. I can’t continue to blame others for my depression and still think that I will feel better. Dorothy Rowe says that instead of blaming someone else or making someone else the scapegoat of our problems, we need to put aside blame and guilt and think in terns of responsibilities and connections. What she means here is that when she has dealt with depressed persons, they seem as though they are carrying the weight of the world and feel responsible for everyone and everything except themselves. She says that when it comes to themselves they se themselves as totally powerless. We need to look at what is happening in the here and now and take responsibility for our lives, without living in the fear of tomorrow and the hurt of yesterday, Humbly ask God to help you live in the now, even if that means living with the temporary horrible pain of depression.”

Source: Depressed Anonymous 3rd edition (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville, KY. pp. 73-74.

NOTE: Click onto www. depressedanon.com where you can order ONLINE informative and helpful 12 Step literature. At the Home Page Menu please click onto VISIT THE STORE, and go to THE DEPRESSED ANONYMOUS PUBLICATIONS BOOKSTORE.

To contact us please use this email [email protected] .

Fellowship, Spirituality

“The final stage of healing…”

February 21, 2019 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

“The final stage of healing is using what happens to you to help other people.” Gloria Steinem

I certainly endorse that statement. If you have had the life threatening experience of an addiction and couldn’t recover without help then this statement makes a lot of sense to you.

Let’s consider what Dr. Bob S, co-founder of AA has to say, “I spend a great deal of time passing on what I learned to others who want and need it daily. I do it for four reasons:

1 Sense of duty.

2. It is a pleasure.

3. Because in doing so I am paying my debt to the man who took time to pass it on to me.

4. Because every time I do it I take out a little more insurance for my self against a possible slip.”

Thanks Dr. Bob.

In our program of recovery in Step Twelve this is pretty much what Dr. Bob is talking about and here is what it says:

“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to the depressed, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.”

If there is anything that has been a greater part of my healing from depression it is in telling my story. I continue to carry the message to anyone who is wiling to listen. Join a Depressed Anonymous group where you live, or if you are alone, then possibly a Home Study avenue might be what you are looking for.

On this coming Saturday I will be honored to be the moderator of a Webinar directed to the Depressed Anonymous groups in Russia and beyond. For more information please check out this website (depressedanon.com ) for Wednesday the 20th of February and get the details on how to log in.

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY.

Visit our Store at the Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore for how to look at Books available on line.

Spirituality, Step 12, The 12 Steps

The Prompter

October 31, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

The prompter is a person who prompts; specifically one who cues performers when they forget their lines. Other speakers use Tele-Prompters, which enables the speaker to read their speech from a screen.

In the Depressed Anonymous program of recovery, we find ourselves listening to a spiritual Prompter — an inner voice, a Higher Power, providing us with a brand new line of thinking. An action oriented prompt, where we come to believe in a Power greater than ourselves nudging us to change the way we think and behave.

But who is this Prompter? What is its name? And why am I hearing it’s voice now. I am hearing it now because I am ready to hear it. Fair enough? I have surrendered. Once beat down by my addictions, I now no longer follow the cues which produced for me a life of negative moods and behaviors. I told the God of my understanding that I’ve had it! No more beating myself up with blame and negative thinking. Negative thinking produced those painful moods spiraling me down into feelings of hopelessness and depression. I had the feeling that all my efforts at finding hope were futile.

The Prompter which I have been listening to in the inner depths of my soul has been leading me towards serenity and filling me with a powerful meaning for my life. After having been introduced to the spiritual principles of the Twelve Steps I continued to listen to the Prompter in the quiet of those daily moments of meditation and prayer.

It was my decision to put my life on a brand new trajectory of wellness and healing. I had a spiritual awakening, ever so gradually. I just knew it was the Prompter itself who was placing a new life script into my heart.

Each and every day of my life I pray, I quiet the chatter in my mind, and draw near to the God of my understanding. When we draw near to God, God draws near to us. What you seek, seeks you.

I believe that my daily conscious contact with God in prayer and meditation I am able to discover that we are no longer dependent on our will but on God’s will for us. And just as Bill W tells us in Alcoholics Anonymous that when we are faced with the indecision about something, we then ask God for inspiration and we let go of struggling for an answer. He tells us that you will be surprised at how the right answers will come after we have practiced this way of living. It also comes to pass that our hunches are more right than wrong. We also pause throughout the day when we are fearful, puzzled or anxious. We pray to the Higher Power for which direction to take. I like the suggestion the best when AA says,” We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self pity, or foolish decisions. We become more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were trying to arrange life to suit ourselves..” (Depressed Anonymous, Page 101). We all know that our new life script which the Prompter has provided us gives our life direction and meaning.

Depressed Anonymous shares with us Meister Eckart’s thoughts on that Vital Spiritual Experience which comes to each of us when we surrender our lives and wills to the God of our understanding.

“This work (birth), when it is perfect, will be due solely to God’s action while you have been passive. If you really forsake your own knowledge and will, then surely and gladly God will enter with his knowledge shining clearly. Where God achieves self-consciousness, your own knowledge is of no use, nor has it standing. Do not imagine that your own intelligence may rise to it, so that you may know God. Indeed when God divinely enlightens you, no natural light is required to bring that about. This natural light must in fact be completely extinguished before God will shine in with his light, bringing back with God all that you have forsaken and a thousand times more, together with a new form to contain it all.” (Depressed Anonymous, Page 161).

“Made a decision to turn our will and lives over to the care of God as we understand God to be.

SOURCE: Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition. (2011) Depressed Anonymous Publications. Louisville. KY. Page 101, 161.

DA Literature, Fellowship, Spirituality, The 12 Steps

I Am Not Broken

September 17, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

More than 30 years ago I felt that I was a broken human being. We all have heard the old saying that “what doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.” Looking back over the time I spent dealing with the darkness within, I now can see my recovery time did make me stronger. That recovery forced me to use tools that I had never realized existed and fit for what I needed to raise myself up. These tools gave me strength for survival. The saying was true: move the body and the mind will follow. Instead of my mind and life spiraling further down into the pit of hopelessness I began spiraling upward with hope. In the beginning of my descent into nothingness I believed that the inner war that was going on in my body was going to kill me. I did believe that I was coming apart, unglued and a danger to myself. I was like a nomad in a wasteland where all the guideposts for directions had disappeared. My life had lost all meaning. My mind resisted thinking about hope and the future. I felt that I was in a state of limbo–no moving forward–only backward and down. My personal pain and anxiety kept me tied down in my own desperation.

Many have found my own story to be a positive statement in which almost on a daily basis I am able to share some of my thoughts about this journey which I am on and which you too can be on. Our own story of recovery is really a tool that others can put to use for their own lives,

My depression experience has provided me with a life purpose and given me meaning which I never dreamt would be my own recovery gift for others “still suffering” to use for their own recovery; the repair of their own personal brokenness. My own life and the Twelve Steps has provided a key which helped me unlock the prison of my depression. The Steps provide ample guidance and direction for those of us who continue the spiral upward, living out in our own lives the hope and purpose which have been promised to those of us who desire a life after depression.

Hugh

You can read the author’s story in the Depressed Anonymous book, plus 30 more personal accounts of those who have also used the recovery tools for their own freedom from depression.

Click on to The Depressed Anonymous Publications Bookstore for more literature which deals effectively with depression and recovery. Orders can be made online.

DA Literature, Fellowship, Higher Power, Hope, Isolation, Spirituality

The “before” and “after” stories of those who freed themselves from the tyranny of depression

July 14, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

I just want to write a few thoughts this morning about the “before” and “after” experiences of group members battles with depression. Before there was a Depressed Anonymous group for me to attend, where I could address my problems, I joined another 12 step program of recovery. It was at this meeting that I heard and saw people who shared their stories how it was “before” they got into recovery and the “after” now that they are living the recovery program.

The difference was like night and day. I could listen all day to a lecture on depression, alcoholism, overeating or any other addiction and not be as moved as I am when I hear the actual person telling their story of how life is now by actively participating in their own recovery. To hear the changes that have taken place in those many people whose lives had spiraled down into the darkness of isolation and hopelessness is a phenomenal experience in itself.

Most of the books which serve as the basic text of 12 step groups such as Depressed Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous, to name a few, all include many “before” and “after” stories of those who have suffered the loss of their self only to find that with the help of the spiritual principles of the Steps were they able eventually to share how their lives had changed dramatically. Their stories are simple, direct and filled with powerful accounts of human beings who once were lost in the chaos of addiction, but now have been freed, living with hope and serenity.

Depressed Anonymous’ basic text has its own “before” and “after ” stories as well. All the stories, the “before” and “after” accounts, give credit to the program of recovery which has changed the thinking and lives of thousands of persons throughout the world. I see these stories manifesting the miracle of the Higher Power, at work in those persons who made a decision to choose to walk that different pathway out of their addictions. They then tell those others “still suffering from depression” about the power they have received.

“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to the depressed, and to practice these principles in all of our affairs.” Step Twelve of Depressed Anonymous.”

Sources:

Depressed Anonymous, recommends its basic text, Depressed Anonymous, 3rd edition for the many inspiring accounts of those persons who came to a meeting, like myself, heard what others had experienced and decided that to see how it worked for them.

Also another excellent publication with many “before” and “after” stories is A MEDLEY OF DEPRESSION STORIES, by the founder of two Depressed Anonymous groups in North Carolina, Debra Sanford. Her work is available at Amazon.com.

Depressed Anonymous Publications also has books available at depressedanon.com. VISIT THE STORE

Depressed Anonymous, Hope, Spirituality, Step 05, The 12 Steps

I have found a new life and a new freedom. Will you join with me?

July 3, 2018 Hugh Smith Leave a comment

AFFIRMATION

My freedom today is growing inside of me as I hope for new life, new friends and new opportunities for serenity and peace.

“We pocket our pride and go to it, illuminating every twist of character, ever dark cranny of the past. Once we have taken this Step Five, withholding nothing, we are delighted. We can look the world in the eye. We can be alone at perfect peace and ease. Our fears fall from us. We begin to feel the nearness of our creator. We may have had certain spiritual experiences. The feeling that the drink (insert depression) problem has disappeared will often come back strongly. We feel we are on the Broad Highway, walking hand in hand with the Spirit of the Universe.” AA Big Book.

CLARIFICATION OF THOUGHT

“…When I am in the early days of my recovery, it is so natural for me to begin thinking how bad things will be today, or when will I actually begin to feel better? I don’t believe that these good feelings will last. I set myself up for sadness. This type of thinking is similar to the alcoholic who think they can take one drink but continue to drink til they are drunk. For us to think that we can start to bash ourselves with sad thoughts without getting drunk with the numbing effects of sadness is sorely mistaken. This is called denial.

I believe with all my power that even though I walk through the valley of darkness that my God will always be there with me. I believe also that my sadness will not last forever, but that today is all I have and I have hope for my day, today. I know that the more I turn to my Higher Power, the more my Higher Power turns to me.

MEDITATION

God, please don’t let us get attached to anything that isn’t of your making. Our thoughts that we will never feel better are really thoughts that aren’t based on fact as most people admit, since they have both good days and bad days in the future. God, help us to have a good day, today! Help us to be free today!”

Copyright(c) Higher Thoughts for Down Days: 365 daily thoughts and meditations for members of 12 Step fellowship groups. Hugh Smith. (Depressed Anonymous Publications, Louisville. KY. Pgs 133-134.)

VISIT THE STORE for information on ordering online this work and many others.

Higher Thoughts is now available of KINDLE.

We believe that what we think, what we say, and what we do impact our depression. We believe that depression can be managed by applying the principles of the 12 Steps. All are welcome!

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We believe that what we think, what we say, and what we do impact our depression. We believe that depression can be managed by applying the principles of the 12 Steps. All are welcome!